Manpacks’ Compendium of Useless Advice no.1—Water Pistols at Dawn with JJ Lee
JJ Lee is a man of many talents and in this Compendium of Useless Advice Manpacks will plumb the depths of JJ’s ephemera by asking JJ questions he has been dying to tackle. Consider it a Compendium of Dubious Answers…and our lawyers note that taking JJ’s advice on the following matter is technically inadvisable.
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Manpacks: What do you do in a water gun fight if someone approaches you from behind (1)?
JJ LEE: So glad you asked!
The biggest mistake in a water pistol fight is to pivot your watergun in a horizontal arc (2). It takes too long and your squirter won’t be on target until the entire maneuver is complete.
Instead…throw your water pistol down and backwards (3)…
…Doing so forces your super-soaking sidearm to travel on a vertical arc and it will align ON TARGET sooner. Note, it will be upside down. Rotate your wrist and pivot on your feet (4)…
Your right foot will be in the lead, or Southpaw Weaver Stance.
If this is uncomfortable, line your left foot up to your right if you prefer an Isosceles Stance.
Congratulations, you got the drop on your sneaky—now wet—rear attacker (5).
May the driest man win.
Guest blogger JJ Lee is a menswear columnist, essayist, and the author of The Measure of a Man: The Story of a Father, a Son, and a Suit. Often, people ask him for advice on matters of style, memoir writing, and the pains and pleasures of fatherhood.
Because his heart-breaking, critically-acclaimed memoir deals with all three topics, he often tells people, quite rightly, to “buy his book.” Actually, you could win a copy of JJ’s book simply by commenting on this post below. That’s how awesome we are around here.